The F-word

We've all said it more than we'd care to admit. Some days I think I say it more than my kids' names. And trust me, I yell their names A LOT. My kids have come to accept that mommy sometimes (or more than I would dare admit to my mother - sorry, mom) says the F-word when she's mad, frustrated, spills something, etc. You get the picture.

My kids also know that they dare not say anything remotely close to the F-word in the event I mistaken that word for the actual F-word. They are no dummies, despite their occasional claims to complete ignorance. So when my son informed me that my 4-year old, Maura, uttered THE word, I immediately went for the sink to get the soap. I never said life was fair. I can say it all day if I so chose. I AM THE MOMMY. So there.

While I was heading to the sink, my husband implored my son to elaborate on the story. What did she say? In what context? Who was she talking to? What was she wearing? He asks for way more details than I care to know.

As I summoned my daughter to the kitchen, Gage reported that Maura had said, "You're a freakin' idiot, Gage." Jim replied, "Are you sure she said freakin'?" Gage stood there in silence as Maura pleaded with her eyes. Time stood still for a moment as I held the soap and all three of us waited for Gage's reply. Finally, he answered. "She said freakin'."

Maura let out a sigh of relief, I placed the soap on the table and Jim chuckled. Never did we address the idiot comment. We were too relieved to have bypassed the cleansing. All the while I am sure Maura was thinking, "Gage, you really are an idiot."